Last updated April 10, 2022

Tags: #literature/books/finished Status: Tags: Social Skills - Confidence Links: Finished-Reading List - Models Book Application

Models Book

Introduction

• Helps with promoting a new form of mascunlinity and personal development
• Part 1 is related to female attraction
• Part 2 is the strategy
  • Long-term growth
• Part 3 is being long-term attractive
• Part 4 is being courageous
• Part 5 is effective communication
• Seduction is based off emotions and movement, rather than words

P1 - Reality

1 - Non-Neediness

• Attractiveness is inversely proportional to neediness

  • Neediness entails one’s reliance on others for self-fulfillment
  • A lack of neediness resonates self-acceptance and a high self-esteem
    • ex) “I like the way he carries himself”
  • Being non-needy means the fulfillment of both needs

• Rather than for approval, non-needy people do things just for the pleasure

  • More investment in themself instead of the other person
    • Investment means the amount we sacrifice our personality for someone else’s
  • Don’t be phased by things
  • Don’t feel obligated to engage in social interactions

• Two needy people or two narcissistic people lead to toxic relationships

Seduction

• Men are more interested in sex prior to investment, but women desire security
• Seduction is when a man gets a woman to become as invested in him as he is in her
  • This can be done by faking a alck of neediness (performance), or actually not being invested in the first place (passive)
    • To do the latter is to focus on more long-term goals
    • The former works, but does not fix the problem
• Relationship encounter pitfalls
  • A long-term relationship when the first impressions were fake
    • Confident guy is actually needy, and the girl used him to escape loneliness and the relationships falls apart
      • Self-investment is crucial for long-term relationships
  • When a partner decides to invest more in themselves, but the other party wants becomes more needy

Overcoming Neediness

• We can overcome neediness by switching our thoughts to ones of high boundaries and self-esteem
  • Instead of worrying on what they think, wonder about if you still like them
  • Instead of wanting to impress, ask if they impress us
  • Instead of thinking on what to say to impress, think of what she might say to impress me
  • Instead of waiting for a call, find things to do
  • Instead of worrying about your appearance, question if they’re hiding your true qualities
  • Instead of looking for intriguing conversations, see if she takes interest in the things you talk about
  • Instead of looking for her approval, think about whether they deserve yours
  • Instead of thinking about why they don’t want to be with you, infer that it probably means you two weren’t a good fit

Narcissism

• Display selfishness to hide vulnerability
• By dissociating emotions with women and focusing on sex and getting numbers, they become more confident
• Narcissism pairs with needy partners to feed their ego, and the needy person is unable to love themselves so they put up with it
  • Works on women with no self-confidence and expect mistreatment
• By basing their self-worth through external objectives, they are still needy
  • Becomes attacked from rejection
• Non-needy people don’t date needy people

2 - Vulnerability

• Vulnerability includes the willingness to put yourself in situations of rejection
• To be vulnerable, we need to not be phased by negative outcomes
• Being vulnerable and showing your true self including your faults
• Women tend to look at non-neediness first, then look at accomplishments and looks second
  • Whether they are following trends or dressing how they want to
• Getting used to vulnerability comes with embarassment
• Share values, desires, feelings, dreams
  • Expose shame and insecurities and doubts and fears
    • It’s the intention of the content that matters, the intention to share yourself and get to know the other person
• We shouldn’t be obsessed with the outcome of vulnerability, as it is who we are
  • Be genuine with your compliments to the point where you are nervous about making them
• Attractiveness → Non-Neediness → Vulnerability → Authenticity

3 - The Gift of Truth

• As long as you stay genuine with what you say, it shows little investment and high vulnerability
  • Say what comes to mind, without filter or shame
• By being blatant with our feelings, we show how we are okay with rejection due to our personal comfort
  • Hiding feelings shows that we are insecure about how we think
• Trust and connection must be built beforehand before showing authenticity
  • Instantly simping shows desparation
  • Initial offerings like money and compliments don’t show one’s character
    • A form of manipulation
• When you receive a compliment, return your actual thoughts
• Don’t expect anything
• People appreciate others who genuinely value them without expecting anything in return

Boundaries

• Know your worth
  • Let people know if they said something offensive
  • Make sure that the boundaries you set are actually yours
• Instead of trying to convince, demonstrate that you are fine with continuing or drifting
  • Saves time and effort

Finding Truths

• It’s important to understand the reason why we want to get into a relationship
• Chasing girls solely based on looks is unfulfilling and is not worth the status symbol
• Discovering our own personal truths and values
  • ex) Curiosity, education, intelligence, authenticity
  • ex) Be wary of peopple who overdress to cover up their flaws

Friction and Projection

• Two reasons why women are not interested
• Friction is when the connection you have with someone is impossible due to their already-existing commitments
  • Don’t try to make people cheat on their partners
  • ex) Religion, culture, logistics
• Projection is when girls project their previous encounters into negatively downplaying your intentions
  • Needy
• By being authentic and seeking authenticity, we can find meaningful connections with the right people

P2 - Strategy

4 - Polarization

• Rejection is important in keeping incompatible people apart
• Girls rarely initiate in the beginning, as they are less invested
• Don’t try to get out of friend zones or already taken people
  • A month or two with a lack of sexual interest is too late
• Narcissistic men are able to polarize people quickly
• Nice people are unable to produce meaningful understandings due to their reliance on shallow tactics
• “Favorite thing in the world”
  • Passion, self-aware, common interests
• Number of receptive women is proportional to one’s lifestyle, social status, and looks
• Converting women to receptive is based off one’s communication and expression
• Meeting women is based on boldness and fearlessness
• Rejection is used to help see who is compatible with our true selves
• Polarization itself demonstrates non-neediness
  • Anything attractive helps with polarization
• People like boldness and honesty

Levels of Interest

• Receptive
  • Demonstrated through
    • Invitations, curiosity, acts of interest, investment
  • Look for reciprocation of your efforts
• Neutral
  • Temporary sorting category
  • Don’t turn you down, but don’t initiate
    • Still want to know more about you
  • Should polarize them to see which they fall under
    • Do things to understand if they are receptive or not
      • Reactivity leads to a natural gravitation towards the unreceptive
• Unreceptive
  • Unavailable/uninterested, lack of attraction
    • Difference of neediness
    • Taken
    • Friction
    • Choosing to be single
  • Seen through neglection of efforts and signs of disinterest
    • Pointless to convince yourself that such people like you, just find out bluntly
  • Don’t bother changing their mind and just move on

5 - Rejection and Success

• Author is bold af
  • Roasted a girl for complaining about the unattractiveness of the guys that were hitting her up
• You can’t control people’s reactions and emotions to you
• Rejection is good since it helps polarize
  • Coming to terms with rejection comes from experience
• Rejection is less about us, but more about compatibility
  • Various external factors can cause rejection
  • Instead of “I hope she doesn’t reject me”, think “I wonder if she’s right for me”
• Success = Maximizing happiness with our s.o. / women we prefer
• Quantity over quality does not work out well in the success equation
  • Just chasing validation at that point
• Honesty comes from:
  1. Lifestyle (living according to our values)
     • Not living the life we want to shows neediness
  2. Becoming comfortable with our intentions (courage)
     • Not acting on our desires shows we aren’t invested in ourselves
  3. Expressing our sexuality freely (communication)
     • Not freely expressing ourselves shows more investment in other people

6 - The Three Fundamentals

• Fundamentals include:

1. Creating an attractive and enriching lifestyle (Honest living)
   • Living a life we are passionate for
     • Environment, relationships, job
2. Overcoming fears and anxiety around socializing, intimacy, and sexuality (Honest Action)
   • Overcoming women-related fear and anxiety
   • Honest action means doing what we want to
     • Being a pussy and not asking a girl out is dishonest action since it goes against what we want to do
       • All stems from inferiority
         • You’re more invested in not being rejected rather than inner desires
     • Correlates with meeting and attracting women
3. Mastering the expression of your emotions and communication fluidly (Honest Communication)
   • Sense of humor, connecting with people, being engaging, charismatic, sexually expressive
   • Correlates with efficiency of finding compatible women
   • A lack of honest communication makes us believe that finding the right one is rare

• Socially anxious men are good at communication and have decent lives, but don’t seek opportunities
• Socially disconnected people lack honest communication

P3 - Honest Living

7 - Demographics

• What kind of women do you want to meet and what relationship do you want with them?
  • You attract what you are
    • Going to a party won’t be helpful if you’re introverted and want more responsible women
• Wtf this john descriptions sounds kinda scary wtf
• Expand and strengthen your interests to be more compatible with and attract more people
• Age, money, and looks matter
  • Men physical appearance peaks at 31
    • Men are assessed on style, grooming
  • The more naturally attractive we are, the less we have to make up for it with our actions and communication
• Social proof helps raise a person’s attractiveness
  • If everyone were to stop what they were doing to talk to you
  • Cultivated through leadership roles in our preferred demographics
• Our actions and messages are amplified by our status
  • At the same time, don’t focus too much on performing to the point where you are out of touch with your own identity

Understanding your Type

• What do you value the most?
• Where would people like you go?
• What do people like you like to do?

Beliefs

• Assortment effect
  • If we believe women are untrustworthy, then women who identify as untrustworthy will put up with what we’re saying
  • Believing women enjoy sex will show in our actions, and let such people express their similar beliefs
  • People tend to conform to what we expect of them
    • Enabling

8 - Lifestyle and Presentation

• Men judge women by physical appearance first, then personality and presentation second
• Physical appearance isn’t the most important thing as a man, but it still helps
• Not putting much time into how we look demonstrates less self-investment

Fashion

• Rules
  1. Wear clothes that fit
     • Sacrifices in comfort must be made
  2. Wear clothes that match
     • Belt should match shoes and accessories
     • Dress pants should match pants
     • Socks when wearing jeans should match shoes
     • Have a brown and black set of shoes, belt, and jacket and put it on top of whatever you are already wearing
  3. Dress to your personality

Fitness

• Don’t focus too much on the specifics and just start

Body Language

1. Consciously remember to not slouch shoulders forward
2. Look straight forward
   • Combined with step one tucks in stomach
3. Feet shoulder width apart
   • Caved in/out feet requires calf stretching
4. Swing shoulders and arms slightly while walking
5. Break eye contact only when others do first

Vocal Tonality

• Expression and loudness is as important as voice
• We have two voices
  • Head voice
    • High-pitched, breathes through nose, from throat
  • Chest voice
    • Low-pitched, breathes through mouth, from diaphragm
• Develop that chest voice babyy
• Talk slower

Character

• Be unique from the rest of the crowd
  • Conforming shows lack of self-investment
• Have opinions, express them
  • Intricately express why you like/dislike things, and your personal experiences
    • Also helps with continuing conversation
  • Reading can help us become more knowledgeable and relatable to other’s ideas

9 - Stories

• Anxiety can be morphed into arrogance and judging
• Our subconscious defense mechanisms take on new forms and reasoning to protect our behaviors and underlying emotions and internal resistance to change
  • We need to question and challenge our resistance

Defense Mechanisms

• We have defense mechanisms for:
  1. Approaching people and starting conversations
  2. Stating sexual interest (phone number, dates)
  3. Initiating sexual contact (first kiss)
  4. Sexual intercourse
• Our DM’s are based on our insecurities and anxieties in that area
  • ex) Telling a girl you’re anxious shows that you care about how others judge you

Patterns of Anxiety

1. Blaming external factors for their fear
   • ex) I got rejected because she has poor taste
   • Can lead to some harmful permanent beliefs
2. Apathy and avoidance
   • Convincing yourself that you don’t care
3. Intellectualizing
   • Theorize and plan instead of actually doing stuff
   • Excuse for prolonging avoidance
   • Can put more pressure to perform

Curing Anxiety

1. Find the pattern to cure that makes us avoid fear
2. Create goals
3. Find accountability

Lack of Sexual Motivation

• Porn ruins our urge to seek women in real life

Nofap strategy

• End all porn and block websites
• Once a week ONLY, even more if you like being horny
• Only allowed to masturbate to real women you’ve met
• Use lotion/lube. slow it to 10 minutes

10 - Overcoming Anxiety

• Women put in the effort to look good so they can find the right man
  • They don’t immediately opt for rejection

  The next time you make your move, when she sees you coming, know that she’s already rooting for you. Secretly, she wants you to succeed as much as you do. And for a moment, she’s your biggest fan. And your role as a man is to take action. It’s all on you. It’s always on you. You move things forward.

• The key to overcoming anxiety isn’t to get rid of it, but to be indifferent to it
  • Accept it
    • ex) Be nervous, but let that nervousness fuel your desire to excel
    • Gradually increase exposure or force yourself to feel the fear of extreme situations
      • Hold hand → Arm around → Cheek kiss → Kiss
      • Be sure to only focus on one thing at a time
        • Know when to move on to the next stage
          • Make sure you aren’t regressing

Courage and Boldness

• When doing something bold (approaching a group of 6 to talk to one person), you must show intention and acknowledge the randomness, or else you’ll seem awkward
  • ex) “This is kind of random, but I thought you were cute and wanted to meet you”
    • The bolder you are, the more attractive you become
      • Enhances polarization
      • When in doubt, assert it out

P5 - Honest Communication

11 - Intentions

• Sub-communication is also communicating with your feelings and intentions
  • It is important to try to take into account the intentions of someone when they say something
  • Understand the difference between teasing and insulting, sharing experiences vs bragging

Creepiness

• Creepiness is behaving in a way that makes a woman feel sexually insecure
  • By being vulnerable, we exhibit a sense of trust, resulting in reciprocation Sex is the ultimate act of vulnerability
• No man liked by women is free of creepiness
• By being comfortable with being creepy, the more unhibited and vulnerable you become
  • Ideal compared to waiting for women to come to you

Sexual Tension

• Flirting is the opposite of creepiness
• Flirting is expressing your sexuality to a woman that makes her feel secure in reciprocating her sexuality back
• Sexual tension is associated with the uncertainty of potential sexual possibilities in an interaction
  • Intriguing
  • Teasing creates tension since they aren’t sure whether you’re interested in them
    • Negative teasing conveys positive intentions behind negative words, creating uncertainty
  • Hence why playing “hard to get” is effective since it builds tension
• “I think you’re beautiful, I’d like to take you on a date” builds sexual tension:
  • Polarizing
  • Aroused by attention and a feeling of importance
  • Demonstrates non-neediness
  • Huge uncertainty as there is a lot of potential sexual intentions with that statement

Emotional Connection

• Proportional one’s self-awarenss of emotional processes and motivations
  • Women like a strong man who slowly opens up to them
  • Attraction creates interest, but emotion truly helps two people connect
• Steps
  1. Becoming aware of your own emotions, motivations, and life story
  2. Initiating by sharing the above
  3. Listen for her reciprocity
  4. Repeat for deeper emotions and connection
• Instead of saying you like something, put yourself into it

  If you feel uncomfortable just reading that and imagining yourself saying something like it, then that’s good. That’s vulnerability. And ultimately, that’s what’s going to make you an attractive man who can emotionally connect with women. Relate to feelings, not facts.

  • Go one level deeper
    • Relate to feelings, not facts
      • Emotional connections are stronger than common interests
      • ambition, shame, alienation, loneliness, achievement, regret, hardship, friendship, love, heartbreak
        • Finding such a common and personally vulnerable connection
          • Commitment is not necessary when talking about such topics

Habits

• Consider your communication habits and room for improvement
  • ex) Eye contact
• Just because something doesn’t feel right doesn’t mean it’s bad, since we need to get used to the feeling

12 - Flirting

• Communication is can easily be misinterpreted, so it’s important to learn how to express ourselves clearly
  • Also important for other relationships

First Impressions

• Few minutes
  • “Hi, I’m John, I thought you were cute so I wanted to meet you”
  • Judged by presentation
  • Don’t scare her
    • Simply walk up and acknowledge randomness
      • Spending excessive amounts of time thinking about what to say is obviously needy
  • Hesitation is bad
  • Smile, handshake????????
• Reasons for rejection include:
  1. Poor presentation
  2. Bad intentions
     • Talk with the intention of knowing them
  3. Poor communication

Conversation Skills

1. Using effective language
   • Don’t intentionally add fillers like “um” when trying to sound confident
     • Use tone and pacing to not sound like a robot
2. Questions vs Statements
   • Maintaining conversations through statement is more powerful than questions
     • Adds your personality
   • Cold reading is when you “intuitively” know something about someone without knowing it; mild predictions
     • “Where do you work?” vs “You seem to be a creative person, I’m sure your job is hella fun”
     • “There’s no way you’re not in the reading club, right?”
       • More engaging and provides positive assumptions
     • Three possibilities:
       1. Wrong and they correct
          • Dismiss that you were wrong, and not like it matters since you don’t know them
       2. Wrong and curious as to your hunch
          • Leads to deeper conversations about her and things
       3. Right and startled at your accuracy
          • Rapport and impressed
     • Cold read in place of asking questions
   • Statements prevents blanking by providing conversation fuel through observations
     • Randomness is okay, just speak what’s on your mind
       • Will reveal yourself and also hear her input
       • Can lead to her asking questions, flipping the script
3. Endless conversation topics
   • Dissect the parts of a statement and build on it
   • Conversations only end when there are no jump-off points
4. Storytelling
   • You should be able to form stories from jump-off points, as well as provide some
   • Three points of a story:
     1. Set up
     2. Content/Conflict
     3. Resolution
        • Note when you are finished

     I knew I wasn’t meant for the 9 to 5 world almost immediately. Out of college, I took a nice job at a prestigious bank in downtown Boston (Setup).

     I hated it from day one. In fact, I remember thinking about three hours into the first day, “I wonder how long I have to work here before I can leave?” (Conflict/Content).

     My next thought was, “This is probably a bad sign.” (Resolution).

5. Relating and Connecting
   • The main topics of conversation should be you and her
     • Everything, including inferred people, should relate back to either
   • Uncovering identity creates connection
   • Be open, encourage sharing, and relate to them
     • Practice: think of passions, dreams, memorable experiences, relationships, and try to talk about them

     Be willing to share any part of yourself to anyone at any time and on any level. You have nothing to lose by sharing yourself.

   • Instead of knowing about your interests, she will know you
     • Sharing relations is like taking their previous experiences and implying the same onto you

Humor

• Stick with humor you are comfortable with
  • Humor is creative and requires the connection of two unrelated things
• Enhances attraction but does not create it
• Don’t overindulge in self-deprecation

Types

• Misdirection
  • Having an unexpected twist of intention with your messsage
  • ex) “You know that look women get when they want to have sex? ... Yeah, me neither.”
• Exaggeration
  • Blow things out of proportion
  • ex) “I’ve seen more attractive things in the bottom of an airport urinal.”
  • Specificity and oddity of details
• Teasing and Sarcasm
  • Must be at appropriate times
  • Derogatory yet playful insults
  • Sarcasm is a complete goldmine or super ineffective
• Swearing
  • Don’t overuse swears
• Wordplay/Puns
  • Pursuing the wrong intention of a statement
  • Intellectual
• Roleplaying/Games
  • Marriage/divorce rp???
  • Can just be spontaneous as long as they get the message
    • ex) “You keep the kids, I’m moving to Europe.” “By the way, your music sucks, and I never liked your casseroles either.”

13 - Dating Process

• Meet → Date → Repeat until final verdict
  • Exclusive? Casual? Fuck buddies? Soul-mates?

Texting Rules

• Only ask for phone numbers if they are genuinely interested and you are genuinely interested
• Just straight up ask, no need to be evasive or creative
• Don’t dwell on flakes
  • Three strikes
  • Test by seeing if they respond quickly
• Wait a day before starting a conversation?
  • Judge the possiblity of a date based on interests
  • Just be blunt with texts, the creativity should be in the meeting
    • Me: Hey Mary, it was nice meeting you tonight. Her: You too! :) Me (next day): Hey, you said you work until 4 PM, right? Her: Yes, do you still want to meet? Me: Yeah. How about 7:30? Her: Can we do 8? Me: Sure. In the city center? Her: Yes, in front of the X restaurant. Do you know where it is? Me: Yea, see you there. Her: See you soon. :)

Date Advice

• Don’t do lunch dates, try to aim for night-time after the day’s chores
• Start around 6-9 PM
• No movie or dinner dates

  • A stream of various activities

  • Active, particpatory, allow for touching and flirting

    • Dancing, walks, grabbing a drink, museum exhibits???
    • ex) Coffee → Ice cream → Park → Shopping
    • ex) Window shopping → Comedy show → Quick dinner → Local park

  • Think of gotos near you
• Intimacy comes from experiences, not just conversation
• Always be leading with the next idea
• Ensure conversations get deeper and personal
  • Start off with playful banter → Get deeper and deeper
• Just pay unless she stops you

14 - Physicality

• Women are turned on by being desired
  • Prefer being dominant and assertive
  • ex) Both getting tied up and marriage
• A little touch can amplify the sexual tension of a conversation
  • Integral for seduction and dating
    • Express your sexual energy LMAO
  • If they say stop, ask if they really are uncomfortable or why
• Light touches on the arm, and slowly get deeper as comfort increases
  • High fives
  • It’s important to develop your own physicality

Signals

Pre-approach

• Non-accidental eye contact
• Smiling
• Approaches you
• Chosen proximity
  • Close seats on the bus

Conversational

• Excessive smiling/laughing
• Hair touching
• Dialating eyes/eye-contact
• Standing closer
• Prioritizes you

Escalation

• Isolates with you
  • Asks to go on a walk
• Ditches friends
• Touches you back

Kiss

• If you think you can kiss her, you probably could have 10 minutes ago
• Less saliva, less tongue, less pecking
• Imagine a massage with subtle pressure
• Hands on her body
  • Carressing back
  • Holding neck
  • Pulling hips
    • Pull her belt closer
• Don’t try to escalate things

Consent

• If she isn’t hesitant on letting you touch her breasts, she’s fine
• Pre-heat her ass
  • Light touching → Kissing → Kissing + Hands → Clothes off touching
• If they don’t want to sex, let them know you’re okay with whatever they feel comfortable doing

S EEXXX

• Women become more invested after sex, while for men it is vice versa
• Foreplay time!
  • When in doubt, be slow, as it will create further tension to the point where they will initiate it
  • A drawn-out, sensual experience
  • Breastplay, clitplay
    • Rub around and tease first
      • Kiss her thighs
    • Take more time if she isn’t wet
      • Oral sex
• Be dominant
  1. Breathe hard, grunt
  2. Talk dirty
  3. Spank, pull hair, choke
  4. Just do it, and stop when she doesn’t like it
• Be wary of symptoms
  • Cumming too fast
    • Wear a thicker condom, possibly numbing
    • Masturbate prior
  • Limp dick
    • Herbal supplements LMAO
  • Not being sexually comfortable
    • Get more comfortable with them first

Closing

Asking ourselves “What if it was a gift?", can help us find positives in unfortunate events

• The biggest gift is our life, and we shouldn’t disregard it by avoiding engagement

1. Join a gym
2. Upgrade wardrobe
3. Haircut
4. Job security
5. Find a stable hobby

Level 2 - Meeting Women (4 of 5)

1. Figure out your personal demographics
2. Meet 5 women in a day
3. Meet 20 women in one week
4. Meet 10 women online
5. Speed dating

Level 3 - Getting to Know Women (2 of 3)

1. Hold at least three 30-minute conversations
2. Get three phone numbers
3. Go on two dates

Level 4 - Intimacy (2 of 3)

1. Kiss two women
2. Go on a second date
3. Bring someone back home

Level 5 - Getting Sexual (2 of 2)

1. Have sexytime
2. Three first dates

Level 6 - Bruh

1. Have sex in the same day you met someone
2. Have sex on the first date
3. Kiss three women in the first day

References: